Sunday, April 08, 2007

Ere...Umm, I Mean, Election Season

For those of you out there who have had the good fortune to be in Japan when an election is going on, you already know what I'm about to delve into...

But for those who have yet to be so lucky, here we go...

Election season in Japan equals campaign cars.

Kinda like the ones in Back To The Future Part 1 ("Vote for Goldie Wilson!"), except on horse steroids.

The really bad kind.

The worst part is when they drive right by your house at 8:30 on a Saturday morning when you're trying to enjoy a rare opportunity to sleep in.

Let me see if text can convey it...

Me: (snore)

Campaign Car: (off in the distance) vote for me...thank you, thank for me...

Me: (muttering) mrfffrmmff ffmrff?

CC: (getting closer now) vote for me...thank you, thank for me...

Me: (a few grunts, roll over, put the pillow over my head)

CC: (still a few blocks away, but already causing dogs to bark and the Baby Jesus to cry) Vote for me...Thank you, thank you...Vote for me...

Me: (starting to curse this cruel world that we live in, yet still attempting to sleep) razzin' frazzin' mrrffrmffrff

CC: (just up the street, now shaking the foundation of my apartment and opening up holes in the space-time continuum) Vote For Me...Thank You, Thank You...Vote For Me...

Me: (reaching for my shotgun, realizing I don't have one in Japan, and going to the fridge for some rotten eggs I've saved for just THIS occasion) I hate election season...I hate election season...I hate election season...

CC: (stopping directly in front of my apartment, as if to punish me for a deed I committed in a previous life, and calling up the Lord Cthulhu from his primordial prison to come into our dimension and eat the world) VOTE FOR ME!!! THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!! VOTE FOR ME!!!

Me: (stepping out on to my doorstep clad in Rambo: First Blood Part II gear and preparing to start World War III all by myself) YOU STUPID IGNORANT FOOLS!!!! I DON'T EVEN HAVE THE RIGHT TO VOTE HERE!!!!!!!

CC: (speeds off in fear at the sight of crazed white man in Japan)


(as I proceed to destroy 20 city blocks in my rage)


Anonymous Patrick said...

Atleast the elections are today, so hopefully those vans will stop. But I agree I wish I could stomp on them too.

Though I only got flyer's for the Democratic party, so I hope they win as they were the only one to care to leave me a flyer's.

Hope teaching is well in Muroran, do you have Sakura yet? We are still waiting up North.


Sunday, April 08, 2007 10:54:00 PM  

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